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all the things

chaotic insecurities
i pluck my eyebrows and shave my legs,
flaunt my assests, work my strut and see whos looking.
i spent 3 hours coloring my hair and 1 straightening it,
i walk with my head held high yet i slowly lower it
in the presence of those known as "real women".
i wear a mask of makeup to cover my imperfections
and paint my nails to add beauty.
yet its still not enough.
I'm told if i weigh more than 110 pounds i need
to lose it.
i'd like to personally thank those who helped
convice me that it doesnt matter how you lose it,
so i stick my finger down my throat and let it all
come back up. it doesnt matter at least i ate something.
i dumb myself down a little so i dont make you feel
unintelligent. your welcome.
still its not enough. so i will continue to "improve"
myself to fit the perfect profile. but somehow deep down
i know i'll never get there but i WILL keep trying.

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