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speaking to the silence

I wonder if I am the only one who speaks my troubles out loud to no one at all. I know no one will answer me. It is just so much easier to express myself to the silence than to a person who can look at me. I release so many emotions without wondering who is looking at me, whether or not I have to be strong and put together. I am a mess but I am a mess at its best.

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Oh Me Oh My

Life, its been quite the journey. As much as I've wanted to get back at this again, I have also been avoiding it. There has just been so much that has happened from my time in North Carolina until now. This is somewhat of a recap I suppose. I left NC with a lot of unwanted baggage. I say this in the most metaphorical way possible.
As most of you all know. I was married to a marine and we lived out in Camp Lejeune. It was a pretty awesome stay as far as the friends and opportunities I had.  Unfortunately it was short lived due to my ex-husband not being a very nice person and to some of the PTSD he suffered from that went untreated. Basically the relationship was toxic and abusive. So much so that I lost a lot of who I was in always being on the defensive and sticking up for myself. I'm not saying that is was all his fault. Just as in any relationship, both parties are responsible for nurturing or poisoning. So here I am almost 5 years later living my life and loving it.

bedtime music, can you see what kind of mood i am in. ;)