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Showing posts from March, 2011

She Snake

They called her beautiful
The girl with twisted smile.
She has them convinced, it's all for good intentions.
But a snake at heart, she slithers inside them,
Waiting for the perfect moment to strike.
Her bite is quick and painless,
But hr venom, beyond deadly.
She holds them on a string of hope and a thread of their own insecurities.
She acts as the puppeteer and they are merely her puppets.
If she go up they follow
If she says down they bow at her command.
Little did they know, death is what waits for them in her chambers.
One by one they enter and one by one they disappear.

a day at the beach

Today was an acceptional 83 degrees outside and us ladies decided to take advantage of it.. Onslow beach in North CarolinaPublished with Blogger-droid v1.6.7

that girl

The raw emotion is overwhelming..
"I'm like that bastard child,the reason daddy didn't stay"Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.7


I found this completely true with us women in todays society. It is sad what we measure as being pretty.. EnjoyPublished with Blogger-droid v1.6.7
i don't understand this keeps knocking at my door. you caused this great awakening within these walls. i'll lick my lips and daydream my days away. i am nothing meassured next to her pure reflection. she truely does have it all.

half alive

I was whole today, but only for a moment.
I remembered what it felt like to be human, to embrace life.
To have love thats not just me giving and them taking.
In that moment my heart pumped the blood through long lost territories and vast emptiness.
My smile was real, not just a mirror image of the memory of what once was.
The sun shown brighter and i knew it was just for me.
Rays of light kissed my face and warmed my insides.
I was empowered at the thought of taking on life.
But it was then life laughed at me, shaking my vulnerability in my face.
The sun was just a mirage caused by my souls dehydration.
My heart struggles to push life back through these veins.
My smile melted and my face became as fake as those around me.
Now i am back to living half alive.
Back to memories of a time before you broke me.Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.7

i am not so naive

Sometime I wish people would learn not to underestimate me. When I want to get somewhere or get something accomplished I am very capable of doing so. Of course there are always limitations and set backs but I know how to push through it. I lived in a time where our money was tight and we had very little but we made it through.. Just because I am where I am today and don't look like i have ever had to fight my way out of the bottom doesn't mean anything. Looks can and are deceiving. Of course I don't believe in telling what most would call a "sob" story. I am not one who looks for a pity party.. But please know that I do know what it is like to go without in many aspects. I embrace that time in my life and it has taught me to be thankful of what I have. I will never forget it but I also will never return. Was it by choice and my own doing?? Of course not, who chooses to go without? Being born into it is one thing.. but staying in it is another. We all make decisio…

the missing me

breath departs from my lungs
as he sits heavy on my chest.
screams escape my vocals
at his rough hands.
each and every touch
disgusts me more and more.
slowly he runs down my chest on to my stomach...
he reaches the southern regions.. you know the places where noone is suppose to go.
i shiver and shake. how can i face this. how can i face him?
i feel as my insides are being ripped to shreds. the pain shoots up my body.
who am i? where did this come from? what did i do....
he hungerly wanders the hollow shell thats left of me and i forcibly close every reaction in my bag of bones.
i know he is almost done, his body reacts in pleasure as mine only dies.
with every ounce of energy left within me i hold myself together.. i cover as much as i can.
i have been branded for life, this is one dirt that can never wash off, one memory i can never consign to oblivian. He is no more and i am noone.. all that i was has been kidnapped and raped.. i am no longer an innocent.

empty inside thats what happens …

New Jersey- it keeps gettin better

After a long moment of being away, I am BACK. I am absolutely positive everyone missed me. :)

I took a vacation with BooBoo. We went back to her home town; Long Branch, New Jersey. Let me tell you I have never had so much fun. I never wanted to come home. Of course I know living there would probably be such a different story, but it seemed to have everything and was so close to big cities.. and a B-E-A-C-H. Plus I love her family. Being around them made me feel a lil more complete i suppose. I met some pretty amazing people, seen some amazing things, and had an incredible time. This girl couldn't have asked for anything else.
Here is a lil' humorous story that I will share with you. On the morning before my birthday BooBoo's baby decides to come in the room a lil early to give us what you could say a wake-up call. Her hands are covered in what I thought to be plant dirt because she had been notorious for digging in the plants on earlier occasions.. So non-chalantlythat'…